Blog Details

What If the Most Dangerous Abuse Leaves No Bruises?

In Kenya, when we talk about gender-based violence, what often comes to mind are the visible wounds: bruises, broken bones, femicide. But what about the violence you can’t see—the kind that happens every day, behind closed doors, through words, threats, silence, monitoring, economic control, and psychological torture?

This is coercive control—a form of intimate terrorism that destroys autonomy, erodes self-worth, and keeps women trapped in cycles of fear, shame, and powerlessness.

And yet, coercive control is not criminalized in Kenya.

What Is Coercive Control?

Coercive control is not one incident. It’s a pattern of abusive behavior—often subtle, but devastating. It may include:

• Isolating a partner from family or friends
• Monitoring their phone, messages, or movements
• Controlling money or access to employment
• Sexual coercion or emotional blackmail
• Threatening to harm children or pets
• Humiliation, constant criticism, or gaslighting
• Destroying personal property or self-worth

While it affects both genders, women are overwhelmingly the victims. In most cases, coercive control escalates over time and can lead to physical violence or even femicide.

In Kenya, this is not a rare problem. It’s widespread—and often ignored.

Why Our Current System Fails Victim-Survivors

Kenya’s Sexual Offences Act, Penal Code, and Protection Against Domestic Violence Act (2015) primarily focus on physical abuse, threats, and bodily harm. But coercive control operates below the radar of the law. Unless there are visible injuries, most women are left without recourse.

A woman being tracked with spyware by her partner, denied access to her M-Pesa line, or constantly degraded at home may not have "evidence" strong enough to stand up in court—but she is still in danger.

Police often dismiss these cases as "domestic disagreements." Judges ask for physical proof. And community elders, when involved, may urge reconciliation over justice. In short: the law doesn’t see her pain.

Coercive Control Is Psychological Warfare

Studies globally and regionally show that coercive control is as harmful to mental health as physical abuse. It leads to depression, PTSD, anxiety, and in many cases, suicide. It strips away a woman’s autonomy—making her doubt herself, feel worthless, and believe she cannot leave.

This is not love gone wrong. It is a calculated system of domination—and the justice system must treat it as such.

Learning from Other Countries

In Scotland, England, Wales, and Ireland, coercive control is now a crime. After Scotland introduced its new laws in 2019:

• Police reported over 1,000 charges in the first year alone.
• 96% of perpetrators were male.
• Prosecutors found that proving patterns of abuse was often easier than proving a single violent incident, because broader evidence could be introduced.

Critically, the law was co-written with survivors, legal experts, and women’s rights organizations—not imposed top-down.

Why Kenya Must Act Now

Kenya is at a critical juncture. With rising femicide cases, increased reports of emotional abuse, and digital harassment becoming normalized, coercive control must be recognized as a crime.

But we cannot copy and paste foreign laws. Kenya’s approach must:

• Center survivors' voices and local realities
• Be sensitive to cultural and digital contexts, including cyber abuse and financial exclusion
• Address patriarchal norms that reinforce control as discipline or entitlement
• Reform police, courts, and community-level justice systems to respond empathetically

What a Kenyan Law on Coercive Control Could Look Like

A strong legal framework must:

• Define coercive control as a pattern of abuse—not a one-time incident
• Include economic, emotional, digital, and sexual coercion
• Focus on the harm caused, not just the intention
• Allow evidence of long-term patterns—messages, testimonies, surveillance, etc.
• Train police, magistrates, chiefs, and community leaders on recognizing and responding
• Establish non-criminal pathways for survivors who do not wish to engage with the police
• Be developed in partnership with survivors, women’s rights organizations, and human rights defenders

From Survivors: “They Finally Asked the Right Questions”

As one survivor in Nairobi shared:

"He never hit me, but he erased who I was. I lost friends, my job, and my joy. No one believed me—until I spoke to a counselor who said: ‘That’s coercive control.’ It saved my life."

Survivors across the world say the same thing: it wasn’t the violence that broke them—it was the slow, sustained, invisible abuse that no one took seriously.

Beyond Laws: Reforming the System

Criminalizing coercive control alone won’t fix everything. The justice system can retraumatize, and many women may never report. That’s why we must also:

• Invest in safe shelters, mental health services, and legal aid
• Support community-led alternatives to formal justice
• Build awareness campaigns in local languages and media
• Integrate digital safety and economic empowerment into GBV programming

This Is the Feminist Fight of Our Time

Coercive control is not a private issue. It’s a public justice crisis, deeply tied to power, gender inequality, and cultural silence. If we are serious about ending violence against women in Kenya, we must criminalize this form of abuse.

It is time the law asked the right questions—and offered the right protections.

Join the Campaign to Criminalize Coercive Control in Kenya

• Advocate for inclusive consultations
• Support survivors' voices
• Push for legal reform
• Demand accountability across systems

Because emotional abuse kills, too. And justice delayed is justice denied.